This week’s Parsha, Parshat Yitro, is one of many firsts. It is the only book of Tanach that is named after a non-Jewish character. It is the first of two (Parshat Va’Etchanan) Parshiot that highlight the foundational bedrock of the Asseret HaDibbrot, the Ten Commandments. It is the first time that Moshe is given redirection for his decisions as a leader and the first time he encounters sincere dissension amongst his people. Any and all of these topics are worthy of further review and discussion. Not today.
Yitro was a very impressive person, the first person recorded in the Torah who recognized Hashem’s greatness and that of the Jewish people enough to make a real and lasting change in his life. He makes a real and lasting impression on Moshe’s leadership and in the field of leadership as a whole:
וַיַּרְא֙ חֹתֵ֣ן מֹשֶׁ֔ה אֵ֛ת כׇּל־אֲשֶׁר־ה֥וּא עֹשֶׂ֖ה לָעָ֑ם וַיֹּ֗אמֶר מָֽה־הַדָּבָ֤ר הַזֶּה֙ אֲשֶׁ֨ר אַתָּ֤ה עֹשֶׂה֙ לָעָ֔ם מַדּ֗וּעַ אַתָּ֤ה יוֹשֵׁב֙ לְבַדֶּ֔ךָ וְכׇל־הָעָ֛ם נִצָּ֥ב עָלֶ֖יךָ מִן־בֹּ֥קֶר עַד־עָֽרֶב
And the father-in-law of Moshe (Yitro) saw all that Moshe was doing with the people. He said, “What is this that you are doing to the people? Why are you sitting alone as the rest of the people stand from morning to night?” - Shemot 18:14
Yitro saw what leaders such as Simon Sinek wrote in his seminal book Eaters Eat Last that “the true price of leadership is the willingness to place the needs of others above your own.” Moshe needed the guidance, knowledge and awareness of someone from outside of the Jewish people to help him learn what he was missing in his own practice. This epitomizes the notion that we, as Jewish people, have much to learn from those around us:
בֶּן זוֹמָא אוֹמֵר, אֵיזֶהוּ חָכָם, הַלּוֹמֵד מִכָּל אָדָם
Ben Zoma says, “Who is a wise person? Someone who learns from all people.”
- Pirkei Avot 4:1
If Yitro is such an intelligent and pivotal player in the story that is unfolding, why does Moshe send Yitro away prior to receiving the Torah? The Mazchor Vitri says that Moshe sent Yitro away prior to Matan Torah - the receiving of the Torah - so that he would not act as a separation and interruption between the Jewish people and the receiving of the Torah. Why would he have a negative impact on the Jewish people? He just had one of the most meaningful impacts a few short moments ago!
The beginning of our Parsha will help us more deeply understand Yitro view point on Judaism and this point in his personal exploration:
וַיֹּ֘אמֶר֮ יִתְרוֹ֒ בָּר֣וּךְ יְהֹוָ֔ה אֲשֶׁ֨ר הִצִּ֥יל אֶתְכֶ֛ם מִיַּ֥ד מִצְרַ֖יִם וּמִיַּ֣ד פַּרְעֹ֑ה אֲשֶׁ֤ר הִצִּיל֙ אֶת־הָעָ֔ם מִתַּ֖חַת יַד־מִצְרָֽיִם׃
עַתָּ֣ה יָדַ֔עְתִּי כִּֽי־גָד֥וֹל יְהֹוָ֖ה מִכׇּל־הָאֱלֹהִ֑ים כִּ֣י בַדָּבָ֔ר אֲשֶׁ֥ר זָד֖וּ עֲלֵיהֶֽם׃
And Yitro said, “Blessed is Hashem that He saved them from the hands of the Egyptians and of Pharoah, that he saved the nation from their grasp. And now I know how great Hashem is from all the other deities because of that which the Egyptians attempted to do to them.
- Shemot 18:10-11
Now Yitro knew? What changed? The meforshim, commentaries, explains that Yitro was an explorer, searching all of the various religions, testing them out to determine which spoke to him more personally. Yitro narrowed down his list until he came to the conclusion that the only one left was Hashem. What Moshe was afraid of is exactly this.
The terminology used in the text is not that the Jewish people heard the events of Matan Torah, they saw and experienced it as reality. It was as clear as day with no question that it was the truth immemorial. The Jewish people accepted the Torah with the statement of we will do and then we will listen. It was not an acceptance of choice. It was a personal realization of seeing reality, internalizing it and, as if it was a reflex, to accept their reality, our reality. It is an ontological reality that Jews needed to accept.
The commitment we will act and then we will listen is not about looking at our choices, creating pro and con lists and then making an informed decision. This process was an act of faith, an act of relying on Hashem as His children and we trust that this is what we need and what the world needs. Yitro, in his essence, could not be present for this moment as his story was diametrically opposed to this concept.
When we think about the religious commitments we make - saying brachot, eating kosher, learning Torah, following the mitzvot, speaking and dressing according to certain guidelines and everything in between - we are not making a choice as much as we are leaning into a reality. A reality of being a Jewish person, a reality that relies on the faith and trust that we have in Hashem and His desire for us to spread this way of life in our communities and beyond.
Judaism is not a religion of compromise. We are not losing out on the opportunity to do or be anything. FOMO - the fear of missing out - has no place in the conversation. A life dedicated to Judaism and its guidance is a life of faith, in faith and spreading faith. A life dedicated to Hashem and His mitzvot is a life connected to the source. We are not compromising, we are capitalizing. Yitro couldn’t see it until testing all the other possibilities. We often get lost in the same storm. This week’s Parsha helps remind us what really matters.